the melancholy death of oyster boy
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Stick Boy liked Match Girl,
He liked her a lot.
He liked her cute figure,
he thought she was hot.
But could a flame ever burn
for a match and a stick?
It did quite literally
he burned up quick -
Her skin is white cloth,
and she's all sewn apart
and she has many colored pins
sticking out of her heart.
She has many different zombies
who are deeply in her trance.
She even has a zombie
who was originally from France.
But she knows she has a curse on her,
a curse she cannot win.
For if someone gets
too close to her,
the pins stick farther in.
-
Mr. an Mrs. Smith had a wonderful life.
They were a normal, happy husband and wife.
One day they got news that made Mr. Smith glad.
Mrs. Smith would would be a mom
which would make him the dad!
But something was wrong with their bundle of joy.
It wasn't human at all,
it was a robot boy!
He wasn't warm and cuddly
and he didn't have skin.
Instead there was a cold, thin layer of tin.
There were wires and tubes sticking out of his head.
He just lay there and stared,
not living or dead.
The only time he seemed alive at all
was with a long extension cord
plugged into the wall.
Mr. Smith yelled at the doctor,
"What have you done to my boy?
He's not flesh and blood,
he's aluminum alloy!"
The doctor said gently,
"What I'm going to say
will sound pretty wild.
But you're not the father
of this strange looking child.
You see, there still is some question
about the child's gender,
but we think that its father
is a microwave blender."
The Smith's lives were now filled
with misery and strife.
Mrs. Smith hated her husband,
and he hated his wife.
He never forgave her unholy alliance:
a sexual encounter
with a kitchen appliance.
And Robot Boy
grew to be a young man.
Though he was often mistaken
for a garbage can. -
oh... dark and morbid.... brooding... love it..
-
I once knew a girl
who would just stand there and stare.
At anyone or anything,
she seemed not to care
She'd stare at the ground,
She'd stare at the sky
She'd stare at you for hours,
and you'd never know why.
But after winning the local staring contest,
she finally gave her eyes
a well-deserved rest. -
y all so qi cham one............... -
where got cham....very us......some of us at least..Originally posted by FireIce:
y all so qi cham one...............
-
morbid... really morbid but.... somehow lovely...
-
The Boy with Nails in his Eyes
put up his aluminium tree.
It looked pretty strange
because he couldn't really see. -
One day in the park
I had quite a surprise.
I met a girl
who had many eyes.
She was really quite pretty
(and also quite shocking!)
and I noticed she had a mouth,
so we ended up talking.
We talked about flowers,
and her poetry classes,
and the problems she'd have
if she ever wore glasses.
It's great to now a girl
who has so many eyes,
but you really get wet
when she breaks down and cries. -
Of all the super heroes,
the strangest one by far,
doesn't have a special power,
or drive a fancy car.
next to Superman and batman, I guess he must seem tame.
But to me he is quite special,
and Stain Boy is his name.
He can't fly around tall buildings,
or outrun a speeding train,
the only talent he seems to have
is to leave a nasty stain.
Sometimes I know it bothers him,
that he can't run or swim or fly,
and because of this one ability,
his dry cleaning bill is sky-high.
-
heyyyyyyy!Originally posted by ratinacage:Of all the super heroes,
the strangest one by far,
doesn't have a special power,
or drive a fancy car.
next to Superman and batman, I guess he must seem tame.
But to me he is quite special,
and Stain Boy is his name.
He can't fly around tall buildings,
or outrun a speeding train,
the only talent he seems to have
is to leave a nasty stain.
Sometimes I know it bothers him,
that he can't run or swim or fly,
and because of this one ability,
his dry cleaning bill is sky-high.
its stain boy!!! -
He proposed in the dunes,
they were wed by the sea,
Their nine-day-long honeymoon
was on the isle of Capri.
For their supper they had one specatular dish-
a simmering stew of mollusks and fish.
And while he savored the broth,
her bride's heart made a wish.
That wish came true-she gave birth to a baby.
But was this little one human
Well, maybe.
Ten fingers, ten toes,
he had plumbing and sight.
He could hear, he could feel,
but normal?
Not quite.
This unnatural birth, this canker, this blight,
was the start and the end and the sum of their plight.
She railed at the doctor:
"He cannot be mine.
He smells of the ocean, of seaweed and brine." -
You should count yourself lucky, for only last week,
I treated a girl with three ears and a beak.
That your son is half oyster
you cannot blame me.
... have you ever considered, by chance,
a small home by the sea?"
Not knowing what to name him,
they just called him Sam,
or sometimes,
"that thing that looks like a clam"
Everyone wondered, but no one could tell,
When would young Oyster Boy come out of his shell?
When the Thompson quadruplets espied him one day,
they called him a bivalve and ran quickly away.
One spring afternoon,
Sam was left in the rain.
At the southwestern corner of Seaview and Main,
he watched the rain water as it swirled
down the drain.
His mom on the freeway
in the breakdown lane
was pouding the dashboard-
she couldn't contain
the ever-rising grief,
frustration,
and pain.
Really, sweetheart," she said
"I don't mean to make fun,
but something smells fishy
and I think it's our son.
I don't like to say this, but it must be said,
you're blaming our son for your problems in bed."
He tried salves, he tried ointments
that turned everything red.
He tried potions and lotions
and tincture of lead.
He ached and he itched and he twitched and he bled.
The doctor diagnosed,
"I can't quite be sure,
but the cause of the problem may also be the cure.
They say oysters improve your sexual powers.
Perhaps eating your son
would help you do it for hours!"
He came on tiptoe,
he came on the sly,
sweat on his forehead,
and on his lips-a lie.
"Son, are you happy? I don't mean to pry,
but do you dream of Heaven?
Have you ever wanted to die?
Sam blinked his eye twice.
but made no reply.
Dad fingered his knife and loosened his tie.
-
As he picked up his son,
Sam dripped on his coat.
With the shell to his lips,
Sam slipped down his throat.
They burried him quickly in the sand by the sea
-sighed a prayer, wept a tear-
and they were back home by three.
A cross of greay driftwood marked Oyster Boy's grave.
Words writ in the sand
promised Jesus would save.
But his memory was lost with one high-tide wave. -
whoa.........
nice.... very...... dark... -
Unwisely, Santa offered a teddy bear to James, unaware that
he had been mauled by a grizzly earlier that year -
Stick Boy noticed that his Christmas tree looked healthier
than he did. -
Brie Boy had a dream he had only had twice,
that his full, round head was only a slice.
The other children never let Brie Boy play ...
... but at least he went well with a nice Chardonnay. -
i want more!!!
-
go buy the bookOriginally posted by HENG@:i want more!!!
it's gorgeously and cloth bounded and only $36 i think -
To avoid a law suit,
we'll just call her Sue
(or "that girl who likes
to sniff lots of glue" ).
The reason I know
that this is the case
is when she blow her nose,
kleenex sticks to her face. -
There once was a morose melonhead,
who sat there all day
and wished he were dead.
But you should be careful
about the things that you wish.
Because the last thing he heard
was a deafening squish -
where can i get e book?
-
Kinokuniya ...DUH!Originally posted by HENG@:where can i get e book?